Is doubt, inadequacy, or a lack of self-worth holding you back?
You might question your abilities and decisions at every turn. Trying new things or walking into the unknown terrifies you because you don’t believe you can rise to the occasion. And when you see how others live their lives, you can’t help comparing yourself and feeling “less than.”
You may constantly attempt to please your peers, friends, and family. As long as you can keep peak performance and meet everyone’s needs, you are golden. But as soon as something is less than perfect or a challenge comes your way, your inner critic takes over.
Who am I to say/try/do such a thing?
I’ll never make it.
I’m not good enough.
It may not seem like it right now, but you are enough.
My name is Christian Holmes, and I’m an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT) Registration #120391 under the supervision of Mark W. Baker, Ph.D. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #MFT19289. I offer therapy for self-esteem issues and other services to support adults and teens living in California.
Low self-esteem can drain your motivation, sense of safety, and belonging. It can impact your identity, relationships, and emotional health and interfere with your capacity to grow.
Therapy helped me hold on to hope and overcome the lack of self-worth that was keeping me from enjoying my life. Today, I strive to help others reconnect with themselves to build their confidence and reach their goals.
Read below for more information about self-esteem and how therapy can help you!
Ready to start therapy? Contact me to book a consultation.
What Is Self-Esteem?
Self-esteem refers to your sense of personal worth, value, and respect. It’s a spectrum that varies from person to person and affects your overall well-being.
People with healthy levels of self-esteem may feel competent, safe, and confident to keep going. People with low self-esteem or self-esteem issues may struggle with negativity, lack of conviction, and self-criticism.
What Can Cause Self-Esteem Issues?
Your self-esteem starts developing during your childhood and fluctuates over the years. It may be influenced by your age, genetics, socioeconomic context, systemic conflicts, the media, and life experiences.
Poor self-esteem can show up as a symptom of other mental health challenges such as anxiety or depression, but it can also happen as a result of:
- Abandonment or neglect
- Bullying or shaming
- Being compared to others
- Body image issues
- Changes in career, financial status, or physical health
- Disabilities or medical conditions
- Loss or missed achievements
- Rejection, discrimination, or stigma
- Relationship or family problems
Do I Need Therapy for Self-Esteem Issues?
Common signs of self-esteem issues include:
- Anger and blame
- Difficulty expressing needs or setting boundaries
- Dismissing accomplishments
- Fear of failure
- Feeling unworthy and helpless
- Focus on flaws or weaknesses
- Guilt and shame
- Lack of confidence and motivation
- Negative self-talk
- Self-doubt and insecurity
- Trouble dealing with feedback or trying new things
If you struggle with self-esteem issues, you may believe your inner critic and take those negative thoughts as facts. This sparks a sense of hopelessness and exhaustion, making it challenging to pursue and reach your goals.
Being unable to accomplish what you want then continues to feed your negative self-talk. You may resort to harmful habits to quiet your internal voice or avoid demanding situations to stay safe. This pattern can be detrimental to your health and prevent you from growing and appreciating your life.
Regardless of what’s causing your self-esteem issues or what specific symptoms you are experiencing, therapy can support you to step out of this cycle.
How Can Therapy Help With My Self-Esteem?
Therapy can help you rebuild a relationship with yourself to have a healthier outlook on your abilities and potential.
During your therapeutic journey, you will:
Feel Heard, Seen, and Recognized
The time we spend together is yours. You can come as you are to share your story and express your thoughts and feelings. I’m here to listen and validate what you’ve been through, not to tell you what you want to hear but to provide candid feedback, ask questions, and nudge you to notice.
Sometimes we are so caught up in our turmoil that we fail to observe our achievements, expand our perspective, or connect the dots to find hidden patterns. I will guide you to get to know your authentic self and automatic (sometimes distorted) thoughts to find a way forward.
Accept Your Strengths and Shortcomings
As we peel back the layers of your true self, I will encourage you to accept what is—what’s happened to you and your reality versus your narrative about it. You will see your strengths and victories as well as your weaknesses and drawbacks for what they are, without dwelling on the negative, ignoring the positive, or seeking perfection.
The purpose is to practice being kinder to yourself while reframing failures and successes as opportunities to learn, understand what you need, and evolve. This shift in perspective can challenge harmful thoughts and improve your outlook on yourself.
Lead a Life Aligned With Your Values and Goals
Having a clear perspective can then help you picture what matters most to you. We will identify your values, establish realistic goals, and define practical steps to reach them.
As you align with your values and move closer to your objectives, you will gain confidence and feel better about yourself and your capabilities. This can have a favorable impact on your work, studies, family, and relationships, as well as your ability to care for yourself.
Therapy for Self-Esteem With Christian Holmes
I’m an Associate Marriage and Family Therapist (AMFT) Registration #120391 under the supervision of Mark W. Baker, Ph.D. Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist #MFT19289.
I offer therapy for self-esteem issues for teens and adults in Pasadena, Glendale, San Fernando Valley, Beverly Hills, San Gabriel Valley, and nearby locations. I also provide group therapy, couples therapy, and Christian counseling.
My practice specializes in self-esteem, trauma, ADHD, anxiety, depression, and anger management. I’m trained in different therapy methods, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Psychodynamic Therapy, Narrative Therapy, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). I also use mindfulness techniques to support your journey to awareness, acceptance, and compassion.
As someone who has struggled with poor self-esteem, I know it hurts. I recognize powering through the day despite your negative self-talk is no easy task, and I can’t say the work we’ll do together will be easy either. But by choosing yourself, acknowledging what is, and opening up to this process of exploration and reconciliation with the self, you are welcoming new possibilities into your life.
My hope is that you will gain motivation, feel empowered to make your own decisions, and start trusting yourself to navigate your present and future challenges.
It takes courage and determination to heal.
Let’s work on accepting your painful truths and embracing your strengths to create the life you want.
Contact me to book a consultation or schedule a therapy appointment today!